“Move bitch, get out the way. Get out the way bitch, get out the way.”
Just a song by Ludacris and my morning commute when people are taking the absolute piss!! Or because I left 10 minutes later than I should. Whoops!
The morning rush hour is not the time to drive 40mph on the M4. Thank god I only drive to the office 1 day a week or I’d end up in jail.
Don’t make me throw my hands in the air at you because I will do it and we all know what the gesture means. Don’t test me huns.
Road rage can take you from zero to 100 and make you lose your mind faster than a Kate Spade sale. I try to remain calm and zen but these assholes really be testing me.
First of all do not drive up my ass when I am doing the speed limit (probably more) and I have no place to go. You bet your ass I will now turn into driving miss daisy and have pure joy watching you flip me the bird. Hiya hun I see you boo! Much love.
Do not switch lanes like your practising your audition for the latest fast and furious film. You look like a twat I can assure you.
Also you know that little leaver on the left hand side? No? Well let me share the magical joy it brings.
If you use that it lights up a section of your car. It looks so beautiful and joyous. Plus it lets people know where you are going as I’m not a superhero and do not have psychic powers. Sounds magical right?
Now use your indicator you dick! And no I don’t mean as you’re in the middle of a turn. We all know where you and your shit spoiler are off by then hun.
Honestly……..
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